It was a little under a year ago when I wrote this blog post: Relationship Advice: To move in or not move in.
It may look a little contradicting that I did decide to move in with my boyfriend after 5 months of writing that post. But, let me explain!
I truly/wholeheartedly still believe everything I said in that post. Trevor and I spent 5 1/2 years of dating before we decided to move in. So yes, we did our homework on ourselves before we decided to do life together. I just happened to write that post towards the end of us not living together – so not the best timing, maybe?
Anyways, Trevor and I sat down around November/December of last year (2019) to talk about the next step of our relationship. We both agreed that we felt so ready to wake up every morning and end every night, together.
Living together is a huge commitment and test in a relationship. So we knew once we took this next step in our relationship, it was the next step to forever. Once you move in with your boyfriend, it’s not like you are going to have another roommate ever again (if it works!) so the pressure of making it work, is kind of real.
Trevor and I are obviously serious about each other (I mean 5 1/2 years is telling), so living together could have been the make it or break it to our relationship, which is scary to think about!
I mean you hear stories all of the time of long-term relationships breaking after moving in together. Even if you are constantly having sleepovers at each others house, you don’t truly know what it’s like living with your person, until it actually happens!
The timing of Trevor and I moving in together was actually comical. We found our dream apartment RIGHT before the quarantine happened and a day or two later, secured it a day after the Governor of California put the state on lock down.
At the end of the day, we have no idea what living together looks like outside of being quarantined together. I basically gained not only a male roommate during this transition, but also a coworker, lmao!
And it has been so easy!! We are both kind of surprised about how normal this feels. Like it has been sooo seamless. I feel now would be the time (being quarantined) where we would show some weaknesses in our relationship, or feel like we don’t have space to breathe, or get on each other’s nerves because we are with each other for 24/7… but it has truly been amazing!
We have had one baby argument (just yesterday) but quickly took a walk, apologized and talked it out. We have learned that communication is more important than ever right now.
Trevor has been putting in sooo much effort into keeping things neat and tidy (just the way I like them). We have created systems – I cook, he cleans or vise versa. We both help out with emptying out the dishwasher and making the bed every morning. He takes out the trash more often than not and I do the grocery shopping more often than not!
Finding a routine and figuring out our roles as we live together has been a rewarding process. We feel proud of ourselves and proud of each other when we’re both helping out around the apartment. We’re taking pride of what we own, together.
Living with Trevor has made us even closer, which I didn’t know was possible. The timing may be comical, but it couldn’t have been more perfect.
The wait was worth it.