Life Without Antidepressants

I truly never thought I would see the day! Of course, I wanted to get off of my anti-depressants someday, but they worked magic on me when I needed them most two years ago. The thought of not being on them was…. Scary. Read my mental health posts here, here, here and here.

Would I relapse into depression?

Would my panic attacks come back?

So many fearful thoughts would rush into my head at the thought. And then I would think…

Will I be on these for the rest of my life?

How would I be able to have kids while being on these?

Thought after thought. Going back and forth on a decision.. Making excuses. Telling myself I will wait until my life slows down a bit…but it never slowed down.

It took me about a year of going back and forth to finally feel comfortable about my decision on going off of them. I had to think back around the time I absolutely had to go on them. It was 2 ½ years ago. My life was completely different. 

2 ½ years ago I had just graduated college, the company I was working for was very toxic, and my relationship with my real Dad was extremely stressful and causing so much harm to my mental health. 

Now, I’m living in a cute little apartment on the beach with my roommate, Jess, I’m working an amazing job as a podcast media buyer, I have the best side hustle in the world – forming a healthy little community, I’ve cut ties with people who hurt me and only surround myself with family and friends who are supportive and make me a better person, I’ve grown so much closer to God and I’ve learned how to work out for my mental health. 

I have set my life up with so much more success in those 2 ½ years. I have the resources and support to get off the antidepressants… and that’s when I knew it was time.

As I’m writing this, it has been seven weeks since I stopped taking them. The first two weeks was a breeze. I didn’t feel any withdrawals. In fact, I felt better. My libido was back, I felt emotionally steady and happy. 

It was the next two weeks that were a bit harder. I felt like an emotional rollercoaster… kind of like I’m about to be on my period… but my period isn’t coming for another few weeks so I know it wasn’t that! 

Those next few weeks, I was crying a lot and struggling with social anxiety, but that was truly it. 

During this time, I was super open to my mom and Trevor about everything and anything out of the ordinary. Talking to them made a worlds difference. 

Also, being off of social media during this time had helped me exponentially.  More than I will ever know – so I totally recommend getting rid of the apps while transitioning off. 

Now, I feel really good.

Here’s what I’ve been doing that has been helping me transition off:

  1. Yoga (at least once a week)… The first two weeks I did it every day. 
  2. Keeping myself productive … don’t just keep yourself busy, but make sure you’re doing tasks that better yourself every day. I have worked on my website, blog and strategy more than ever this month. 
  3. Journaling …. Every morning I write what I’m grateful for and every night, I write about what the best part of my was.
  4. Planner – my planner has kept me accountable. Every Sunday I write what my workouts for the week are going to look like.
  5. Keeping my friends close and my family closer. Talking about all of my feelings, dreams, aspirations, and thoughts has been so helpful on making me feel less alone for not always feeling  100%.
  6. I also got back into therapy <3

I hope you found this blog post helpful! Getting off antidepressants isn’t for everyone. I’m definitely not against them as I know as much as you know, how much they can save a life. In fact, I’m soooo grateful for them. However, my time being on them is done. I no longer need them so why be on a medication that I don’t need to take? 

You know your body more than anyone else does. Listen to your body and make your own decision. 

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  1. Annette Coerper says:

    You are amazing!!

  2. Carly says:

    I love the vulnerability and positive ways you’re helping your mental health! It inspires me!